Daily life - Others
Amazingly Enough it Doesn't concern me That i have no athority !

The Secret that Must to Told!

It wasn’t going to be easy but somehow I’d have to tell my mother. Keeping it to my self would be a bad idea, and my friends don’t know what I’m going through. Maybe if i told a total stranger that would be easier. No wait, the stranger would think I’m weird. Though it can’t be that bad, everybody’s doing it. I suppose I could hide it. That should be easy enough. Maybe if I go on some sort of talking strike. No, that’s not smart. I’m starting to think I’m lying to my Mother. She’ll find out soon I know it, she knows me to well, I mean I’ve lived with her most my life. I could … Write it in a letter, or a note, maybe an email. That way she can’t yell and scream and stuff, I’ve got it!
The Next day, I woke up bright and early knowing the news that awaited my mother. The only difference was the pain I was currently going through, why did I do this? Why would people do this it’s basically torture, self harm? Every inch of me at the time said that it was a bad idea. But something must have triggered my mind to it, what was going through my mind?
Let go back and recall the moment: I was with my Friend Amber.
Amber and I were hanging out on Friday sometime in August, just doing the usual girly things. Shopping, talking, just the usual things you would expect teenage girls to be doing, but this clearly wasn’t a normal teenage girl day. When we came across a Tattoo place. The building was black and white, and it was quite small. I looked at my friend and she looked and me,
“you’ve GOT to be kidding me!”
“So what do you think? Should I do it?” I Asked her
“What? Get a Tattoo? NO! No Way” she yelled “that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say and I’m your best friend”
“Ok! I won’t get a tattoo, but that’s not what I want to get I want to get… now brace yourself for this Amber, a PIERCING!”
“Seriously, like are you sure you want to get a piercing?” she asked with suspicion
“I don’t know to be honest; I just have this erg to do something, beyond imagination, something totally out of the blue, something I could get in trouble with, that’s legal.” I answered, knowing in the back of my mind this would have to be the dumbest thing I’ve ever thought about doing.
“Seems fair enough, so what kind of piercing?”
“Well, tongue, because everything else I know will either hurt too much or, be too noticeable, or will be VERY unconformable.”
“True” she agreed “but why now? Why not when your older and have more of an idea of the consequences’ of your actions and all that kind of stuff, there’s more to this then you think, it goes deeper, beyond just pay and go?”
I was shocked… Amber of all people, my BEST FRIEND was trying to convince me to do the right thing.
“yeah I understand that, but by the time I’m older and more responsible, I’m not going to want to get a piercing done, I want to get it, to say –I got a piercing-”
“Well then if you think it’s the right time, and you really know what you’re doing, then I’m not going to stand in your way”

We go into the store and we sit in what looks like some type of waiting room, mixed with a McDonald’s take-away bar. This strange man that looked as though he was going to kill me but also like he was a school teacher… didn’t really know what to think of him. He gives me a glace and continues the tattoo he was giving this old woman with wrinkly skin. After about half an hour of waiting he finally comes to me and my mates and says
“Which one of you ladies is getting a piercing?”
She’s looks at me and i look at her, basically we were lost for words kind of.
“Me” I replied “my mates just here for support”
“if you’re not Sure about getting anything done then don’t because we don’t want to have any trouble now do we?!” At this point I didn’t know if he was asking a question or stating a fact.
“Nope, No trouble here, Mr, just an interest in piercings”
He *gives a look up and down, looks us both in the eyes* and walks to the back room. I lead over to my mates who eyeing this queer guy in the corner and I say
“I feel like we’re doing something illegal or like we’re doing some sort of drug deal”
“Wooow back horsey, you’re not getting me into drugs!” the whole room went silent
What!? I didn’t say anything” trying to make her seem like she was imagining things
“Huh? Are you sure? I thought I just hear you say something about drugs? Oh my gosh I’m going insane, there’s something in the air that I should be inhaling”
She takes a deep breath and sits in silence; I believe see’s trying to hold her breath.
I tickled her, she gives up to holding air thing and gives’ me the evil look.
“Do you want to wait outside?” I ask with a sarcastic tone in my voice
“That would probably be the better thing, don’t take too long though aye, I don’t want to look like a freak waiting outside for you” she walks out, with a DING of the door bell. The queer man watches her leave with this confused look on his face.
“She’s a bit of a worry isn’t she?”
“Haha yes Mr she is, but she’s my best mate and i have to love her through all her flaws”
“Yes I understand, so what are you getting done?”
“My tongue, I’m getting it pierced”
“Oh, and how old are you?”
“Why is there a particular age I have to be?”
“I’m not sure, maybe”
“oh well I’m 14, hope its aloud, I really want to get it done, it should be find though, my other mate got it done here, and she’s my age”
“Then you should be fine, you look worried, are you ok? Sure you want to do this?”
Just at that moment the man on staff comes out,
“Right lets...... hold on wasn’t there another girl here?” he seems a bit concerned
“Oh yeah, that’s my mate Amber, yeah no she’s outside”
“Haha bit she’s get cold feet?”
“No actually its quite warm in here” in my head I’m thinking ‘no you dork it’s an expression, he thinks she’s too scared to get a piercing done to’
“Umm... right ok then, are you ready?” lucky he didn’t decide to make me feel like a total dick just then, what a nice man. I signal's to Amber that I was going in.
“Now, what was it your getting pierced?”
“My tongue” I replied with confidence
“Right then, common in” I walk past the front desk, into the ‘backroom’ sounds scary but it really wasn’t. He gets this container fall of tongue stud bars and balls
“Which colour would you like?”
“Umm... Tongue colour? I know that’s a hard colour, but as close to my tongue colour as possible would be great as long as it’s not too visible” I didn’t want too many people knowing, and especially I don’t want my mother finding out.
“Hmm... I’m not too sure what colour that would be, but how about pink? Hold your tongue out...” I poked out my tongue and he put the stud next to it, it looked pretty close to my tongue colour
“Is this close enough, can’t get any close to tongue colour then that” I suppose pink is going to have to
“Yeah pink is fine”
“alright, Hoop Up” he patted this chair I still thought the whole thing was getting kind of dodgy, but at least the guy was nice, I didn’t even know his name
“Umm… Mr…? Is this going to hurt?” I was getting quite worried
“It shouldn’t … Stick out your tongue” I did, I actually thought this was it
“No it shouldn’t at all” well, that was a sign of relief
“Ok, you ready”
“As ready as I’ll ever be” I stick out my tongue and he grabs it with these tongs
“I was about to ask you what your name was but that’s a bit hard now aye”
NOT the right time for Jokes I was thinking, but of course I didn’t say that, that would be mean, I meant he’s the one with the needle about the put it in my tongue and cause me agonising pain
“all done!” was he serious, was it really done, I closed my mouth and sure enough it was there, oh my goodness, it felt so strange, there’s this object in my mouth, this is weird
“Oh wow, didn’t even feel anything”
“See I told you it wouldn’t feel that bad” phew it was over, I could go home now
I got my wallet and paid the man
“So is there anything I should or shouldn’t do?” he took a breath oh no !
“well… just be careful, don’t eat chicken, umm yeah don’t drink big amounts of fizzy, yeah no that’s about it, really no rules, but if it gets infected, go see the doctor or anything else come see me”
“Alright, sweet as, thank you’ll left the store and meet Amber outside
“You got it done, everything’s alright? Good? Great let’s go!” she really didn’t like the vibe she was getting from this place, but seems ligit to me.

So now come the tough part, telling mum… it was the night my cousin came around to stay the night, I told her hoping to guilt would lighten up
“OH MY GOD! Are you serious? Show me!” I showed her and of course as per usual she told me I shouldn’t have done it and that I was going to be in big trouble with Mother
“Yes I know all this and I’m going to tell her, I just got to wait for the right time”
“There will never be a right now, at least if you tell her A.S.A.P there your grounding will be finished by the time you’re out of high school” really?, grounding oh no!
“Haha your NOT FUNNY, jezz, lay off me woman”

Later on that night when Mum got home from work I tried not to speck too much as my speech had changed. Hi Mum love you was really all I was going to say
“hey Girls” she said as she walls in the door, holding bags of food and drink, I think I saw chocolate there to, it really had to be tonight, the one night she brings home chocolate, *sigh* the world can be so mean. I walked out of the room and as I left I looked at my cousin and mouthed the words
‘DON’T SAY ANYTHING!’

I clocked over to 10 o’clock and Mother came into my room, looks me straight in the eye, I braced myself for something huge
“Show me” what was she on about?
“Show you what?”
“Don’t play dumb with me girl, you know exactly what I’m talking about”
Oh no, she found out about my tongue, but how?
“Oh right…” I showed my tongue both top and bottom, she examined and eventually said,
“At least it’s not infected, but on that note, either you remove that by tomorrow or I’m getting it surgically removing it”
“WHAT!!! That’s not fair, you can’t do that!”
“Oh Yes I can, you’re my daughter and what I say goes” she walks out and of course I had to do what she said but at least I didn’t have to tell her, she already knew. But how did she? I walked out to the kitchen and asked to speak to mum
“What do you want?” she looked angry so I was quick
“Umm I wanted to know how you knew.”
“Sam told me” Sam was my cousin
“Oh ok, thank you” I walked off. I was so angry, I trusted her but there’s no point arguing about it. Some things are just better left unsaid.

Still today I don’t have a tongue piercing, but the whole left will remain for the rest of my life, but I think I learnt something from this whole experience, not only that disobeying parents is a REALLY bad idea, but that I don’t always see the consequence, I may think I do but deep down, there is always going to be something I don’t know.



-Vickie (5 July 2010) -

Each trip gave me shivers; I could feel each and everyone staring at me like I was some type of movie, or something they hadn’t seen before. Second by second, I started to self destruct. Myself confidence has worn out, Like old pants in the back of the closet. Every time those eyes plunged at me, a knife went through my heart, piercing every vain, just as another second goes by. My heart was identified as having an unknown connection with a curtain persons heartbeat, and so my heartbeat would synchronise with your heartbeat, suppose it was like a song I could never forget , and when we were together it was like the bass of a song, beat after beat, or the drums at a live concert. My Heartbeat was never alone. I was never alone. But now I only ever see darkness. Like a cloud of dark dust, volcanic ash dust trying to suffocate me with ever breath. Like smoke pouring into a sleeping baby’s room with no other mission but destroy everything in its path. Even if the baby struggles, or even wakes up. It doesn’t matter… feeling weren’t anything, unknown The black darkness of horrific terror was holding me down. My eyes shut tight and my breath weakened. I was struggling, every gasp got harder. Every inch of me was telling me I must go on, but still I was scared, alone, terrified. It was so cold. Freezing. Suddenly I just gave it all up, like the end of a test. Released it all. A Sigh of not relieve but of disappointment. I failed. Couldn’t do it. Now I beg on my hands and knees at the mercy of death and its leaders. Requesting another shot. Only to be let down. Let down again, no one and nothing believed in me. This was it. The end was Here.
The Light was coming closer and closer. As I walked towards it step by step, my heart beat slowing down each time I kept walking closer towards the unknown brightness. The pain, all my pain I felt... Gone, but with nothing to spare. Why was this happening? What did I do? The light was getting brighter and I started to Squint. Then this warmth, like no other warmth I’ve ever felt, with love & Happiness, it surrounded me, and then I start to loss my memory. Every single little detail including my childhood. “What’s going on?” I asked “What’s Happening?” I started to float off the ground and melt into thin air till suddenly, I felt this shock in my chest. Like a bolt of electricity. It hurt! What was that? The light and all its glory started fading away. The warmth leaving me like a storm coming, then I close my eyes because I was frightened. It was all happening so fast. What’s that? I start to hear voices. Who are you? I yell, then I opened my eyes and all of a sudden I’m looking into a doctor's eyes. He’s shinning a light in my eyes. He asks “can you hear me? Do you know where you are?” I simply replied “Home”.



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Amazingly Enough it Doesn't concern me That i have no athority ! (Daily life - Others)    -    Author : Vickie - New Zealand


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last update : 2014-06-17

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